Where Chester Lives - General

25 Things I Can't Live Without

nospam@example.com (Coy Thorp) — Fri, 11 Sep 2009 12:44:58 -0700

Yup. It's another list. Shoot me.

Turn by turn GPS.
Cellular Phone with email and web.
The Internet (insert smarmy name for internet here, such as IntarrWub).
Good pen.
Sunglasses.
Peet's Coffee and Tea.
The personal computer.
The transistor.
Black Forest ham.
English muffins.
DVR.
Modern medicine. ESPECIALLY modern medicine.
Antibiotics (see above).
Bicycle helmet.
Memory foam mattress.
portable MP3 device.
Burritos.
Febreze.
Ethernet.
Fry's Electronics.

And now for the serious ones. These are more important than the snarky list above, obviously.

My God.
My wife.
My daughters.
My friends.
My dogs. Sometimes, even Gigi. but mostly Chester.

Bike Crash 2009!!!

nospam@example.com (Coy Thorp) — Sat, 25 Jul 2009 11:19:34 -0700

Okay, so here's what happened. I was riding one of my favorite loops yesterday, the American River Parkway around Natoma Lake. I got about 6 miles into it when I picked up a piece of glass in my rear tire that cut my tire and, obviously, flatted my tube. Luckily (or so I thought), I was a short walk from a bike shop in Folsom. I walked there and bought a replacement tire, which they mounted for me. I rode away from the shop, and decided that I should just ride back to the car and call it a day.

This is where it gets good.

As I was going downhill to a sweeping left-hand corner on the bike trail, my brand new rear tire blows up. LITERALLY. It explodes. At 25 mph. I tried to keep the bike upright, but everything was happening so fast...the rear wheel slides around to the right, and for a split second, I was drifting through the corner, my front wheel pointed in the direction that I wanted to go, my rear wheel sliding along to the right.

Here's the thing. The rear wheel was not sliding on rubber anymore...it was sliding on rim. and metal rims don't have good traction, usually. So, it kept sliding.

The bike slid out from under me completely, and I fall hard on my left side, sliding feet first after my bike for about 10 feet. Not an activity I would recommend to anyone.the brunt of the slide is caught on my left hip, followed closely by my shin, elbow, and ankle. My bike shoes protected my left foot mostly...I just have a scab on my ankle the size of a quarter. My shin has a 10' x 4' patch of road rash, and my left thigh is the worst. I have a serious road rash on it from the hip bone down the side of my leg to about 2 inches above my knee. It is so severe that there is little feeling in it...just numbness. And in places the skin is sagging. It's also quite a wide range of colors...I would dare say every shade of red is represented. I also thought I might have broken my right collarbone, as it was in alot of pain and i was having a hard time moving my right arm.

I didn't stay on the ground long. I got up immediately, venting my pain verbally, without intelligible words.

In about a minute, a VERY nice couple on a tandem comes along and helps me out. Unfortunately, I have forgotten their names...I believe I was in a mild state of shock. His wife pushes the tandem and he carries my bike back to the bike shop...about 200 yards away. I called Teresa during this time, so she is on her way to get me. I walk back into the shop...I hadn't even been gone long enough for there to be new customers. They all remembered me riding away. The shop manager was extremely apologetic, and took responsibility for what happened. While I was waiting for Teresa they gave me some electrolytes because I was starting to get light-headed. They took my bike to the back and assessed the damage...a minor nick on the seat and the rear rim is trashed. They are going to replace everything, obviously. At this point, I knew that my thigh was in bad shape, but it was covered by my bike shorts, which stayed completely intact, and I really didn't want to look.

Teresa shows up a few minutes later, and we decide that we should go to urgent care. By this point, my right shoulder was feeling better...it still throbbed, but i had good range of motion. Luckily, there was no one at urgent care except us, so I got immediate attention. That's when I first saw my thigh...disgusting. They cleaned everything up, did all they could to maintain my dignity, and Teresa and I went home.

So there ya go.

Music Stuff

nospam@example.com (Coy Thorp) — Tue, 10 Mar 2009 07:59:33 -0700

So, a slew of my "facebook friends" have posted various musical lists that were influential in their life or just important to them in some way. I appreciate the sharing of this, and it is an interesting exercise which I feel compelled to do. However, I now HATE facebook lists, so I am just going to post it on my blog. I am making the separation of the two activities in my own mind, therefore it is good here, but bad there. I am perfectly capable of justifying this behavior to myself. It allows me to maintain my elitism while still pandering to the tiny fool of a boy inside of me that screams for attention. So, here goes.

List Number One. The Artists I Like.

These artists are not listed in any particular order, and I have liked or disliked them during different times of my life. Some are iconic, some not. Some you will loathe, and make hasty judgments of my intellect based on my affinity for them. This is me, not caring.

The Beatles -- if they aren't on your list...shame on you.
Led Zeppelin -- "Kashmir" plays in my head while I walk down the street.
Van Halen -- DLR, not SH. or that other hack.
Red Hot Chili Peppers -- his voice is awesome. And I sound just like him in the shower.
The Pretenders -- Punk meets New Wave, takes it around the corner and smacks it upside the head.
Elton John -- Yeah? So?
Elvis Presley -- I blame my mom.
Johnny Cash -- So cool it hurts to look at him.
Queen -- I'm a scaramouche.
Squeeze -- COME ON. You can't write "She's so lucky that she doesn't have to shave, I'm so lucky that I'm not doubled up in pain" and not have me like you.
Pearl Jam -- The ribeye steak of guitar riffs.
Hansen -- just seeing if you were paying attention...
Peter Gabriel -- you got something in your eye there.
Aerosmith -- I'm incredibly afraid of Janie.
The Police -- stadiums can no longer hold Sting's ego, but the music is still teh awesome.
Alison Kraus -- she's a smart aleck with a mandolin. So awesome. And I know I keep using that word.
Ben Folds -- fantastic lyrics, cool piano bits.
BareNaked Ladies -- these aren't the hipsters you're looking for.
The Beach Boys -- Best. Christmas. Album. EVAR.
Johann Sebastian Bach -- Nice wig, dude.
The Who -- The part of the British Invasion that felt...invasive.
U2 -- More self-absorbed than most Hollywood people, but they can still rock.
INXS -- I sound just like him in the shower, too.
Corinne Bailey Rae -- Such a big voice from such a tiny girl.
Dave Matthews Band -- That drummer is blowing bubbles while he plays. BLOWING. BUBBLES.

I promised myself I would keep my lists at 25 or less. NEXT.

Albums. In No Particular Order. I find myself playing these over and over on my ipod, or they reached me in some particular way during some time in my life. Again, you may love them or hate them. But this isn't your list, it's mine.

"Songs From The Big Chair" by Tears for Fears -- the first album I ever bought. On tape (remember those?). I wore it out in my crummy little tape player.
"Violator" by Depeche Mode -- best road trip album ever made.
"Joshua Tree" by U2 -- After Boy, which kinda stunk, and before all the media-garbled crap that was 1991-94.
"My Generation" by The Who -- The kids are alright, man.
Led Zeppelin I-IV. I can't think of a song on any of these albums that I don't like.
"1984" by Van Halen -- I remember recording these songs off of "Casey Kasum's top 40" played on Sundays. Again on my crummy little tape player. "Jump" is still one of the most awesome songs ever.
"A Hard Days Night" by the Beatles -- I really love this album.
"Youth" by Matisyahu -- He's a Hassidic Jew. From Austin. Singing Reggae. And the lyrics are great, and his vocals are all over the map.
"Ten" by Pearl Jam -- I always liked them better than Nirvana...and it turns out, they were less crazy.
"1972" by Josh Rouse -- These songs are sunny and bright, with heartbreaking lyrics. And I'm starting to sound like a Rolling Stone writer.
"Synchronicity" by The Police -- When they still rocked. Another tape that I wore out.
The "Oh Brother, Where Art Thou?" soundtrack. "Man of Constant Sorrow," "Big Rock Candy Mountain," and "Down To The River To Pray." And the rest are really good, too.
"New Favorite" by Alison Kraus/Union Station -- "The Boy Who Wouldn't Hoe Corn" is one of the funniest songs ever.
"Madman Across The Water" by Elton John -- everyone else picks "Goodbye Yellow Brick Road." I like this one better.
"Illinois" by Sufjan Stevens -- Yes, he's a pretentious indie hipster. But this album is great, and sounds like a high school band playing songs they want to play.
"Crash" by Dave Matthews -- Sweet like candy to my soul...
"The Complex" by Blue Man Group -- Best show ever *remembering Emily and I singing "White Rabbit" at the top of our lungs while Tom and Teresa stared at us.*
"American IV - The Man Comes Around" by Johnny Cash -- yes, they are covers. but the original artists wishes they were this good.

Okay, enough for now. time to get on a plane.

On The Third Day of Christmas

nospam@example.com (Coy Thorp) — Sat, 27 Dec 2008 13:10:48 -0700

Can't stand that song, but it is an appropriate title for today's date. After all, today is the third day of Christmas (of the twelve).

I hope you all had a wonderful holiday. We spent time with family, counted our blessings, and kept it very low-key this year. No extravagance, no hectic travels to and fro to visit relatives/friends. With the Christmas play dominating our existence for so long, I don't think we could have done it any other way. Oh...and the play was a resounding success. All four performances were good, but the finale was over the top good. We hit all of our cues and got all the songs right and on key. I expect to get a video soon, and may post bits to youtube, if'n you want. The performances and the pick up rehearsal were fun and I miss them, but it's nice to sit here on a Saturday and have the whole day to get things accomplished. Like laundry (which I am doing now).

This is likely to be my last post in 2008, so a bit of retrospect may be in order. Over all, this has been a successful year for the Thorp family, but we have had (and continue to have) our share of drama. My joy in my children continues to grow, even when I think that they couldn't make me more happy. Well, they could (if they would listen all the time, not just when I get Dad-voice). Anne is turning into a real young woman, and watching her try and bridge that gap between girl and woman has been...interesting. She's the smartest person I know, so she does pretty well. However, she, like her dad, sometimes lacks in compassion (we both think too much), and we tend to not be empathic towards other people. Something we both need to work on, I guess. Emma is just starting the journey into womanhood and we are all holding on for dear life. She solves problems with her feelings, which is great for relationships but doesn't work so well for other things. She has a very tender and compassionate heart (like her mom), but also isn't afraid to speak her mind (again, like Mommy). I would advise those in close proximity to Emma within the next eighteen months to proceed with caution and handle carefully. Having said that, I love them both very much, and will always be their comforter and protector, as long as they need me in that role.

Teresa is the yin to my yang, and I couldn't imagine my world without her.

My mother........it's difficult for me to write about her. I love her, without question. But our relationship is very different. I think it's different from most mother/son relationships, but I may be wrong. I really can't say much more than that. There is love, but it is in the shadow of all the current challenges.

Teresa's parents are awesome people. Jack has filled the father role in my life left by the loss of my own father, and I love him dearly. Thank you both for the great sacrifices you make to help us. We deeply appreciate and love you both.

Our involvement at church has grown significantly this year, and with it we have started to build some great relationships. There's some challenges there, too. Most of it mine, I'm sure. You see, I built such strong and deep bonds with Adam and Paul that it is difficult for me to include others in that group. I don't make close friends easily...never have. Dave, Adam, and Paul are the best guys any friend could ever hope for (I miss you, Dave! COME VISIT!!!). I am beginning to feel a closeness with Harry O...we share some common interests, so that helps. we just need to go caching, which is his passion, and something I've always wanted to do ( I know, Tom. I should really do it). Speaking of Tom, if we lived close together, I really think I would have the same type of relationship with him that I have with Adam, Paul, and Dave. The only barrier is distance. Such is life, I suppose. Teresa is much better at building relationships than I, and she has really blossomed. So, overall, life is good here. My three friends are certainly not out of my life (I just had dinner with Adam and Paul [and families] this past Monday), but we do see less of each other. It just requires more effort on all of our parts to get together.

Work is really good. They like me and I like them. Here's to hoping that '09 sees great success in that category, and that God continues to bless my efforts there.

That's all for now. In closing, please keep Tim and Tonya close to your thoughts. Their current challenge is unique and they need every ounce of prayer that you can muster.

Hamburgers are bad for you

nospam@example.com (Coy Thorp) — Thu, 04 Dec 2008 12:17:46 -0700

But they're SO GOOD.

In other news, locally owned Mexican restaurants have the best Chile Verde.

Movie Review: Quantum of Solace. Okay, so I don't' normally do this, but I'm gonna do it this time. I saw this movie a couple of weeks ago, and the further away I get from the actual viewing, the more underwhelmed I become. I have friends who won't agree with me on this, but I'm beginning to not have liked it. Deal. First, there is the ludicrous title. I KNOW it's an Ian Fleming short story title (which has no plot relation to the movie), but that doesn't make it a good title. That title completely stinks. I can smell it from here, and I'm nowhere near it. Second -- this felt like a Bourne movie, not a Bond movie. Sure, it was action-packed. Tons of explosions and people getting beat up in a ridiculous manner. Honestly, some of those fight sequences were tough to accept. No human could withstand that amount of punishment and continue to be concious, much less upright. I wanted more gadgetry, more subterfuge. More acting, if you will. I can't say I hate the movie, but I can't gloss over the discrepancies in my brain, either. I do like Daniel Craig as Bond, i think he makes it convincing. He's not the best Bond ever though...that's Sean Connery (IMO). Okay. Enough of that...it's not like anyone cares, anyway.

Next week marks one year at WatchGuard, and I can hardly believe it. I still like this job as much as I did when I started, and I really like my boss, Pete. It's really cool working for someone who has the technology down cold, and is personable as well. He's a very smart guy. I talked with my buddy David yesterday and Symyx (the old company) had another round of layoffs. Sadly, he was part of the RIF. Merry Christmas. They laid off 90 people. If that company is still in business in 2010 I'll eat my hat. I sincerely hope that everyone I formed relationships with while I was there is NOT resting on their laurels and is actively seeking something else. I know it's a tough time to be looking, but there are things out there. If any of you read this, please take action. It's much better to leave on your terms than it is on theirs. Ask David. Or Sam. Or Brad. Or Howard.

I tried to start drinking only water this week. I failed spectacularly. Cherry Coke is good, too. I will try again, starting today.

Cya.

Insert Clever Title Here

nospam@example.com (Coy Thorp) — Tue, 02 Dec 2008 07:46:05 -0700

You know you are in an airport when a bottled water and a yogurt cup costs 8 bucks.

I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving. We had a pretty good one, as usual. The highlights were:

The cabin. I love going to J&D's cabin at this time of year. located on the southern slope of the Sierra Buttes, you get some pretty good views of the valley through the trees, and the opposing ridge line. The weather was really great, and we were surrounded by fall color. No, Jeremy, I didn't get to go for a hike at Love Falls this time, so no bear sightings.
The meal. Yes, its about the food. I brined the turkey, as usual, and it turned out really great. All the fixings were good, too. And Dorothy is so comfortable with me cooking in her kitchen now that she took a nap. You shoulda been there the first year...you woulda thought that I was going to somehow wreak mass destruction. the thing is, I pretty much did. I started the turkey really early (it was stuffed, so stuffed birds take longer), and because of it's massive size, it was hanging off the back end of the pan. So, fat dripped onto the stove bottom, the kitchen smoked up and the fire alarm went off. At 5:30 a.m. EVERYBODY got up, and I had to pull the bird out and Dorothy poured salt on the drippings, which stopped the billowing waves of smoke. Also, since this was much earlier in my cooking career, I made a HUGE mess in the kitchen, and Teresa expended much effort cleaning up after me. So, you can't really blame her. It tasted really good, but the aftermath was impressive, to say the least. I've gotten better, but the smoke alarm still goes off every year...
Satellite TV. The reason that this is a highlight is that it was a huge fiasco. Personally, I could have cared less, but Jack was pretty adamant about having working TV. He brought his receiver from home, which expects two inputs. The cabin dish only has one output. So, I spent a significant amount of time moving the one input back and forth, because it would only sync the guide on input one, but only display actual TV on input two. And each switch back and forth was a 10 minute affair. And figuring out that this was the procedure was a one hour affair upon arrival. I love ya, Jack, but this wasn't my favorite part.
My mom. She came up with us, so it was nice having her.
Rick. It's always cool to see Teresa's big brother. I feel like we would be closer if we lived closer...he's a pretty neat guy.

That's it for now. I need to finish my 5 dollar yogurt and hop on a plane.

Peace.

Paging Roger Daltry

nospam@example.com (Coy Thorp) — Thu, 13 Nov 2008 16:48:29 -0700

So, now that I travel quite a bit here are the airports I frequent and what I generally think of them. I am, erm, "inspired" to write about them because I am currently sitting in one. Here they are, in no particular order. As you know, if you have read my blog with any regularity, I find airports, as a rule, very depressing places. However, many of them have tried to take the edge off of a painful process.

And I'm really not sorry if this bores you. It's my blog, after all.

Phoenix -- This is a really nice airport, amenity-wise. It has interesting shops and some good food choices, like Paradise Bakery (Arizona's Panera Bread). Bag claim isn't terrible, but it isn't the quickest I've ever done, either. Plenty of moving walkways, and I once met a guy who played shortstop for the Rivercats there. He was running one of those people movers (I didn't ask). He did have his PCS championship ring, which was far more impressive than I expected. The Southwest terminal is split into two wings, with different security lines for each one. This really helps cut down on the line as this airport is pretty busy. Rental cars have their own mega-facility, and it is easy to navigate and easy access to AZ freeways.

LAX -- Where I am currently. This airport is the pit of despair. The security line at the terminal is right at the door, so you are often in a line outside sucking on car and bus fumes. The colors are all grey and depressing...it really feels like a detention area or some sort of movie-like immigration processing area. There are very few amenities and the actual security line always takes forever. Everything is tiled in that area, so I can imagine that all the women who are wearing sandals when they travel are completely grossed out when they have to remove their shoes to walk through this area barefoot. I get grossed out in sympathy. No one looks relaxed, and the surrounding area is depressing as well. On the bright side...there's nothing here that a thorough carpet bombing couldn't fix. Never checked a bag through here, and plan to avoid that at all cost. Every minute in this space makes my heart sadder.

Orange County -- This is actually the John Wayne airport, and has a huge statue of the cowboy in the bag claim area. The actual airport isn't terrible...it's easy to access, rental cars are a short walk from the terminal, and the security lines are pretty easy to navigate. The amenities are lacking, though. There's only one non-chain restaurant and it lacks in power plugs. The terminal itself is single long hallway, so it can be easy or slightly more difficult, depending on your gate because there are no people movers. However, it's a small place, so rarely is that a problem. The biggest nag here is taking off. The take-off pattern is over Newport Beach, and because of noise restrictions, you feel like you take off straight up and then they cut power way back, so there is this moment of semi-weightlessness. Weird feeling, and jacks with my ears in a bad way. Bonus points for cool surf history stuff on display.

Sacramento -- My local airport is also one of my favorites. Everything is easy to get to, parking and rental cars are close, and the amenities are very nice. They have a couple of cool little restaurants, including a great noodle place. The only downside is checked bags, as they take almost forever to get, so avoid that if you can. There are cool luggage pillars in the bag claim area, which is kinda funny.

Oakland -- this airport has gotten easier to navigate since they re-did the entrance. I haven't flown through here in a while, so I can't speak to its amenities or security line. driving to/from is not difficult, though.

San Francisco -- same as Oakland as far as flying through, but definitely driving to/from is a royal pain. it has easy freeway access, but that freeway is always slammed. Avoid at all costs, unless you are staying in SF only, then it has a BART link which, I hear, is pretty handy.

San Jose -- never flown through, but definitely hate driving to/from. the road is an absolute disaster, signage is poor, and it feels like a post-industrial war zone.

Seattle -- great airport, which will be greater when they complete the light rail to downtown. Lots of really nice amenities, including some pretty good sushi. Never done the rental car, so can't speak for that. security line is pretty good. Bag claim, however, is the longest I have ever experienced. It takes upwards of 45 minutes to get your bag, so stop at Starbucks or Tully's and chill a minute before you go down.

Tucson -- Weirdest airport experience I have ever had. the place is really spread out and absolutely empty. There were three people in the security line and it still took me 15 minutes to get through because of the world's slowest TSA agent. I think this guy had a special skill in that area. Lpatop counters for plug in have these weird backless seats with an awkward footrest that puts you in a very odd position. Designed for form, not for function. Amenities aren't bad, there just isn't many of them. Rental car return felt like an Enterprise in a really small town. Had to do all the legwork ourselves for the return.

I interrupt this broadcast to state that the girls Auburn basketball team just walked by. They are all very tall, which is why it was so noticeable. And one girl was wearing high heels, so it made here look like a seven footer. I guess they play an LA school this weekend. Okay, back to your regularly scheduled airport descriptions.

O'Hare -- I hate this airport almost as much as I hate LAX. Everything is a mile away from each other, and getting to/from is a complete pain. It's been a while since I have flown through O'Hare, so I can't go into detailed descriptions about it. I hates it, though. Hates it, hates it, hates it.

Houston -- This has a huge statue of the elder George Bush in it, which is weird. And a museum. he's not dead, yet.

Louisville -- Easy airport in a small market with easy access. Can't speak to amenities since I didn't use them, but the rental car was really easy...right outside the terminal.

JFK -- The crush of humanity in this airport is overwhelming, and getting to/from is an exercise in frustration and horror. I loathe the airport, even though I have enjoyed both of my visits to NYC.

Newark -- Do I really have to describe this? Really? *Shudder*

DFW -- Connectors through here can be a real bear, especially if your departure flight is at the other end of the double-horseshoe and you have 15 minutes to get there. Nothing like getting on a plane all sweaty and collapsing from heart failure.

There are others, but you get the idea. Hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. If not...well, what can I say?

Peace.

A Typical Weekend

nospam@example.com (Coy Thorp) — Sun, 09 Nov 2008 14:34:25 -0700

So...this is our weekend lately.

From 9-2 on Saturday, it's "our" time. This is the time we have on weekend to do our normal weekend stuff...like bike rides, house cleaning, laundry, yard work, etc. It's been this way for six weeks. From 3-dinner, we rehearse. For example, we rehearsed four scenes yesterday, which included all of us at one point or another. Rehearsals are getting more serious now (Christmas is closer than you think), and we are trying to do the scenes without scripts and with proper lighting and props. Today (even as I type), we are doing the complete Act 2, with stops. That means the director (God bless her soul) interrupts as she sees fit and provides...direction. Also, we have worship in the morning and some kind of thing in the evening (class, home study, etc). The Sunday rehearsals last from 2-4 or 5.

For the record, I am not complaining. I really enjoy this...it's just a pretty big time commitment, and some things slip (like the yard work).

Last Sunday, Emma signed her first song in worship for the deaf members. Very precious. Just thought I'd throw that in there.

It's hard to write a blog entry when I keep interrupting myself to talk to people and look at stuff and glare at the noisy adults while the kids are trying to work their scene (i have a world class glare). But, I persist.

Not much of an entry, I know. But there it is. I promised more about Chad and Brandon last time. I'll do that later this week. Those guys were (and probably still are) the coolest, and took the edge off of a very weird time in my life.

It's 1985 in my brain

nospam@example.com (Coy Thorp) — Thu, 30 Oct 2008 20:19:22 -0700

Because Anne brought home an original NES system, and I played Mario 2 and the fist Zelda. And ExciteBike. Woah. But the system is really finicky (it's old...give it a break) so she is going to take it back to the kid at school who wanted to sell it to her. No amount of isopropyl alcohol and blowing would bring it back to life. Although, it certainly brought back Sunday afternoon's spent at the Shaw family household.

My two best friends in high school (Brandon and Chad) and I would go to Mr. and Mrs. Shaws' house to play Nintendo and ping pong every Sunday afternoon. The Shaws were both math teachers at our high school. Mrs. Shaw taught my geometry class and Mr. Shaw taught my algebra and computer math class (where I learned to write programs in BASIC on TRS-80's). Every Sunday Brandon and Chad would pick me up (I didn't have a car) and then we would drive to their house and proceed to play. I would play Mike Tyson Super Punch-Out until my thumbs hurt. My addiction to video games began there. I would try SO hard to beat Mr. Shaw in ping pong, and never could. We would shoot basketball in their driveway with their two sons. I always felt out-classed...Brandon and Chad were (and, I assume, are) smarter than me, and Brandon was way cooler cause he played football and was a huge guy in great shape. I can remember playing with the kids' Transformers and being a bit jealous that they had them and I didn't (even in high school. i was kind of a nerd, in case you didn't know). I loved that time, and I still go back there in my head sometimes. They lived between Buffalo and Hodgenville, and had an awesome house with a finished basement. The basement in my house was a root cellar, and we stored canned beans and potatoes there, and went there during tornadoes. Not exactly a fun place (lots of spiders. LOTS). They had two televisions. TWO. It was remarkable. I drove by their house last time I was there, but couldn't identify it. I even dropped by the school and no one there could tell me where the Shaws went. I would really like to know...Mr and Mrs. Shaw had great positive influence on me, and their kindness and willingness to have three huge dorks at their house all the time kept me (mostly) out of trouble.

Next time, I'll talk about Brandon and Chad. Two great guys...

Okay...some stuff.

Dear Gum companies: the following are NOT considered flavors. Winterblue. That's a color, not a flavor. Vanilla Chill, Arctic Chill, and Winter Chill. While one has a flavor name in the title, as a whole...NOT A FLAVOR. The names suggest temperatures. Makes me feel...chilly. Elixir, Cobalt, Flare, Rain, and Lush. That's four nouns and an adjective. Not a flavor in sight. Cool Rush. Again, not a flavor. Here are some appropriate flavor names: Cinnamon. Spearmint. Peppermint. Any fruit or fruit combo. I may like your gums, but your flavor names frighten me.

Dear Deodorant companies: the following are NOT considered scents. Game Time. Okay, maybe it is a scent...but certainly not a pleasant one. Cool Fusion. Momentum. Fresh Rush. Cool Rush. Power. Extreme Blast (excuse me? I don't want to put that under my arms). Sport.

Here's what I'm getting at. Your names confuse me. I would like to be able to look at a product and be able to generally tell what it is I am buying. I shouldn't have to play color association games (blue=cool, red=hot, etc) or pop lids on things to see if it something that smells generally acceptable and not like yesterday's gym sock. Please stop. I know you won't listen, but I'm asking anyway.

I'm tired, cold and hungry. Okay...maybe just tired.

Peace.

Cough cough...sputter

nospam@example.com (Coy Thorp) — Tue, 28 Oct 2008 07:20:42 -0700

This one's for you, Tom.

I know, I know. Don't worry... I patronize myself quite enough.

This past summer has been quite the event-filled extravaganza. If you keep up with my facebook, you'll know some stuff. Here's the highlights:

1. Moved my mom to California. At much expense, and with all the associated ongoing drama. Gee, this is fun. I realize fully that she carried me under her heart for nine months, and I am eternally grateful for life. However, this situation isn't going that great for my lil bro and her, and there's alot of conflict there. Pretty sure i predicted that. Layer on top of that the financial crisis that they are enduring, and I can only imagine how thin the nerves are wearing. I had a brief talk with Mom last night, and plan on talking with her more this weekend. We are taking her to our church's harvest festival, so maybe that will help to create a little space for Ben and her. I think they are beginning to realize that this transition will take longer than they expected. Maybe *crossing fingers* some maturity will come out of this, and I won't be the broker of their ongoing conversation. I know...I'm an optimist.

2. Still digging my job. We got some new hardware on the horizon that I am completely stoked to get my hands on. It's a 10G firewall, with line speed content inspection and 3G IPSec. *Drool, drool.* the economy has hit us, just like everyone else, but I think we'll do fine. Especially when I can go into a shop that is running equipment from the evil empire and replace it at less than the cost of a maintenance renewal. In situations like that, the slower economy helps us. I enjoy the travel bits, too. Teresa doesn't, but she is willing to put up with it because she knows I love my work so much. Not as much as I love her, but you get the picture.

3. Two family vacations, one to Disneyland and our yearly trek to Tahoe. Disneyland was great fun, and there are pics of it on my facebook. Go there, why dontcha? I haven't posted any Tahoe pics. I should really do that. Or pics of my cross country U-Haul drive. Thank God for Audible.com and reliable GPS.

4. I stopped blogging.

5. I started blogging again.

6. We (the ENTIRE family) have been rehearsing for a Christmas musical for a couple of months now, at least. It's been way fun so far, and I'm really enjoying it. Anne is one of Mary's friends, Emma is a friend and a shepherd girl (two separate parts), Teresa is Joseph's mother ( I KNOW. I am as shocked as you are. I would have NEVER pictured Teresa on the stage). I'm trying to get her to act more like a Jewish mother..."Oy vey! You never call, you never write, I worry sick about you! And look at you...you look like you haven't eaten in weeks. You're poor mother." I play Gabriel. which means I walk around and look angelic. And talk real loud. I'm good at talking loud, so it's a natural fit. And, since it's a musical, we all sing. There's even a Rodger's and Hammerstein bit that, frankly, annoys me to no end. But I'm in the minority. And, I don't have to do that bit, so I should just keep my mouth shut.

So, that's all for the moment. I am in the OC with all of the plastic people, and I need to go to my first meeting.

How's that, Tom?

Last Week Was...

nospam@example.com (Coy Thorp) — Tue, 15 Apr 2008 06:33:25 -0700

In two words: BRU-TAL.

I spent all of last week at the RSA conference. Now, I've gone to tradeshows before, but this is the first time that i've been on the other side of the booth. Talk about hard work. I spent most of each day standing, and I was tasked with setup and teardown (along with my sales guy). By Friday, my feet, calves, and lower back were in open rebellion and were making plans to secede from the union. It was a good show, though. I talked to alot of customers and spent a good amount of time hanging with our product management guys. It's surprising how many boxes we have installed in the field...more people know about us than I originally thought. But not enough people know about us so...BUY A FIREWALL! Please...my daughters need new shoes.

Okay, if you are a tech person, then you probably know about Twitter. I have toyed with this idea, but in the end, it really seems like a technorati kind of thing. Honestly, it smacks of elitism. Even the language leads in that direction. For example, if you choose to read what I twitter, then I get to call you a "follower." Yeesh. I listen to TWiT and watch Cranky Geeks, and people on those shows talk about it all the time. But, here's the thing. It is so much a tempest in a teapot. I think, largely, that real people don't use this thing. In all honesty, I don't think people are so enthralled with what I have to say that they have to know what's going on THIS VERY MINUTE, which is exactly what Twitter is all about. Besides...it will be owned by a large company soon, and then it will succumb to the advertising engine that is on the internet, and then all of the twits on Twitter will whine and moan, and dream about the good old days.

that's all I have time for. Tune in next time, when we find out what happens to Bobby, who fell down that well.

Please...Stop (Snarky Comments Ahead)

nospam@example.com (Coy Thorp) — Wed, 02 Apr 2008 20:50:34 -0700

Okay, America. I am putting you on notice. If you don't stop the following annoying things, I may have to take away your after-dinner cookie privileges.

Ringtones

We've talked about this before, but it bears mentioning again. I really don't care to hear your favorite song, or mine, for that matter, as your ringtone. It is most annoying. Your cell phone is a PHONE. It should ring...quietly. Vibrate is even better. Anything else is just noise pollution.

Turn Signal

There is a lever located on the left side of your steering wheel inside of your car (I know...shocking, isn't it?). When you push this lever up, towards the sky, it turns on a blinking light located externally on the right side of your car, both front and rear, that notifies other drivers that your are turning right. When you push it down, towards the ground, it notifies other drivers that you are turning left by enabling a blinking light similar to the one mentioned above, but located on the left side of the car. when you push it back to its center position, it turns off all blinking lights and other drivers will assume that you are continuing forward without turning. Not only is it good manners to use this fun and informative feature, it is required by law in all fifty states. PLEASE USE IT. Thank you.

Your Car Stereo

This one's easy...TURN IT DOWN. I don't want to hear your garbled music and all of your sheet metal vibrating in your 1983 Corolla. Better yet, save the money you would have spent on the subwoofer and amp at Best Buy and, instead, take a college course, or put it towards music lessons, or feed the hungry. You'll feel better, and so will I.

Common Courtesy

Please, if you are sitting in front of someone tall on an airplane, don't put your seat back. It makes an already uncomfortable position even worse. And, if you do, don't be shocked when you feel our knees in your lower spine. It's not because we want to push against your seat, its because you have given us tall folks no other option. We are all stuck on this plane together...let's be nice to each other, m'kay?

Blue Tooth Headsets

Unless you are actively engaged in a conversation, take it off. You look ridiculous. And, you don't have to yell. I really don't want to know about your battle with foot fungus, or your love life, or what you need to bring home for dinner.

Speaking of cell phones...

It is just plain RUDE to call someone and talk to them while you should be engaged in doing something else, like paying for your groceries. Talk to the REAL people that exist in your physical space that you are interacting with. It will not kill you to call that person back after you get finished with your current task. You aren't that important...trust me, I know. The only reason to take the call is if you are a doctor and lives are at stake.

Smile

This is really simple, and will go a long way towards making your day better. When you encounter other people, smile. It is pleasant, and in times of need, people are more likely to help you if you are kind and friendly. It isn't hard to do this. At least, it's no harder to do this than it is to scowl at the rest of the world. This helps even if you are having a bad day. If you smile at people, they will smile back. Try it...it really does work. Unless you're initials are TL and you live in Wisconsin...you scare people when you smile (just kidding, T. You know I love you, man).

Buy Clothes That Fit

Guys...I really don't care if you are wearing boxers or briefs, so you don't need to show them to me. The waist size on the tag should closely match the circumference of your actual waist. They should fit comfortably, and if they are slightly too large, then use a belt. Girls, shirts and pants that are two sizes too small are NOT attractive. I know you have it tough, what with society telling you that 'abnormally thin=pretty'. Believe it or not, most people don't agree with that. If you wear clothes that fit, it is more flattering, which actually increases your attractiveness. Also, the shirt should cover the waist completely, even if you have to bend over to pick up a dropped object. I will not elaborate further, since I am striving to be gentlemanly.

Okay...follow these simple guidelines and your life will be enriched. And, more importantly, so will mine.

Enough snarkiness...back to work. Oh, and feel free to add your own grievances in the comments.

I Can Do Two Things at Once!

nospam@example.com (Coy Thorp) — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 20:04:10 -0700

Here I sit, watching the Astros-Padres game on ESPN2. And I'm blogging. For those keeping score, it's 3-0 Padres in the bottom of the 6th. Two outs, bases loaded with the Padres at the plate. Exciting stuff. WOW. Center fielder for the Astros just chased down a drive that I thought wasn't catchable. Good play to get out of a jam.

Chili is curled up next to me, having his "chair time." He does this every night that I watch TV...which is every night for an hour or so.

Speaking of sports, who would have thunk that the Final Four would be all number 1 seeds? I haven't looked it up, but I don't think that happens very much. I picked UCLA, but I don't think they can beat Memphis. If I could change my bracket, I would pick Memphis right now. That team is incredible.

In related news, read this great rant on the tournament the other day. I couldn't agree more.

Game UPDATE: Bottom of the 7th, still 3-0 Padres. Isn't technology fantastic?

Okay...so my riding schedule has picked up again. In no small part due to this purchase. That's right...I finally bought a replacement for my old Marin. In all honesty, the Marin was a great bike. I put many miles on it, and the price was certainly right. But ever since I started logging more serious road miles, I have noticed the weight penalty I have been paying, as well as the not-very-smooth entry level drivetrain action. Shifting to the granny under any kind of power was undoable. I test-rode several bikes, including Trek, Specialized, Guru, Fuji, Felt, Calfee, Cannondale, Orbea...the list goes on. I finally chose the Scott. The biggest selling points on the Scott was the fit and the wheel spec. PLUS my local bike shop gave me an awesome deal. I feel very comfortable on this bike...I have no problem diving it into corners, and going downhill at speed is nowhere near as scary as it was on the Marin. I now keep track of my rides on an online cycling log. This helps alot.

Game UPDATE: 4-0 Padres heading into the 8th. now watching a McDonald's commercial that features a bronze Gremlin.

I wrapped up a campus-wide wireless install this evening at my church. I'll be setting up a guest wireless network on it later this week. It's been fun, but I'm glad that it's wrapping up. I've been dragging this out, and I want to get it complete and off my plate. I still have to setup a local calendar sharing server. Any of you techies out there that have done this before, let me know what you have used. Preferred cost is free, and I am loathe to do an Exchange install to support 5 people. That seems a bit much.

Okay...that's enough for now. I hope your happy, Haley. I'm going to watch the game now. Or maybe Dirty Jobs. I think it's a new one tonight.

Initiating Restart Sequence

nospam@example.com (Coy Thorp) — Thu, 06 Mar 2008 07:39:26 -0700

Let's pretend that the past 6 weeks hasn't happened, m'kay?

An insight into how my brain works (as if you wanted that):

I think about a blog entry. Honestly, I do. I think, "Coy, you should blog. it's good for you and your reader will stop bugging you about a new blog entry." I make a commitment to do it later that day.
Later that day comes. I think I would rather watch Dirty Jobs. I conciously make the decision to do it tomorrow.
Tomorrow comes. I promptly forget.
A week goes by. This is when I start feeling guilty, and think I should really do this. However, it's become such a mountain in my mind that I'm far more comfortable ignoring it completely. Besides, Mythbusters is on.
A month goes by. It's at this point that I realize I am a spectacular failure at blogging, and decide to do an entry anyway.
Hence, today's entry.

The Job

March 10th marks three months with WatchGuard. I fully realize that I am still in honeymoon stage with this job, but I really love it, nonetheless. I enjoy meeting new people; I enjoy talking about technology; I enjoy helping them solve their problems. I am getting better at this whole Sales Engineer thing, I think. The biggest hurdle for me is time management. I know I recommended this great book, and the concepts in that book help tremendously. However, now that I travel some, managing all the other aspects of my life become more important. I have let things slip (like blogging) that I should be doing. That isn't good, and is a habit I need to break. Otherwise, I feel like I am doing my job well and that I am contributing to the success of the company.

Dad-hood

Next week my oldest daughter turns 14. FOURTEEN. This is incredible to think about. She has become this lovely person, with unique individuality and a growing spirit. There are things about this stage of dad-hood that is a little intimidating, but my excitement overshadows that. You hear every parent say, "They grow up so fast." And when you hear this, you shake your head and think, "Can't you be more original in thought?" Ah, but here's the thing. This revelation is absolutely unique for everyone, in that the words do not capture the feeling. Therefore, every parent says it, because you cannot fathom it until it is experienced. And we HAVE to say it, because it is the only words we know that can come close to describing even the blurry reflection of what we are experiencing. Never mind the actual feeling. Words fail completely.

Stuff

We got the car. It is very nice to have a back seat that actual adults can sit comfortably. Also, the back-up camera is very cool.

I've put on too much weight again. Last battle with the scale left me a bruised and battered 229. I went for a run yesterday with my co-worker. First time I've done that since boot camp, really. Yowsa, am I sore. I will get back on my bike tomorrow, and start trying to run when I'm on the road. It's easy to get in 30 minutes of good exercise when you are running. I should probably stop eating garbage, too (eyeing the empty Pepsi bottle next to my laptop). I'm bad at the diet thing. BAD. More veggies, less junk. More veggies, less junk. More veggies, less junk.

That's all I have for now. More later...as long as nothing good is on TV.

NEWS FLASH!

nospam@example.com (Coy Thorp) — Tue, 05 Feb 2008 08:07:24 -0700

I am still living. I have lots to type about, but not enough time at the moment...so instead of a garbage post that is only partly informative (as if you care), I am posting this as a placeholder. Come back soon! Or subscribe via your favorite RSS reader!

Either way...I'll be back this evening. Unless someone crosses the beams and the universe explodes.